It’s been five weeks, four and a half days since I made my game changing decision (GCD) to move back to Toronto to be closer to my family.
Since then, so much has passed
A period marked by extreme action juxtaposed with unexpected calm.
Of confidence stemming from having finally started to live with intention going head to head with anxiety caused by realizing just how much harder it is to fail when you really want something.
Two weeks post GCD found me in New York City for some much needed mother-daughter time. My Mom and I both have worked so hard on strengthening our relationship this past year and this trip felt like the reward for that.
The contrast with our last trip together to Dublin in January 2009 was striking. We are closer. More comfortable. Not perfect but able to be honest about that. This is my fav pic from our trip, taken after experiencing our first ever dosas at Hampton Chutney. Highly recommend if ever you find yourself in the Big Apple looking for something different.
Three weeks post GCD found me prepping my condo for sale. The contrast between the nine or ten hours I spent cleaning and staging on an otherwise stress-free Sunday afternoon compared to the weekend of 16 hour days I spent doing the same thing when prepping my house for sale about a year ago was striking. So much more sure. Of why. And of what comes next. Here’s one of my fav listing shots.
My realtor listed us on a Tuesday and I accepted a conditional offer at full asking two days later. This past Thursday, five weeks and two days post GCD, the deal was made firm.
The time between listing and finalizing the deal was tough for me to navigate. Fueled by a bad case of “don’t count your chickens ’til they hatch”-itis, my anxiety levels were pretty high.
In a not unrelated development, the period around the sale found my chronic jaw / face pain driving me particularly bananas. As referenced in my last post about touch, I found significant relief in a new form of massage therapy.
The calm I have found in the three one-hour sessions with my craniosacral therapist in the last three weeks has been life altering. I’ll write more about this piece of my healing journey soon, promise, but for now will simply observe that it has helped me reach a new level of self-awareness. Of understanding around how I carry tension and trauma and what I need to do to heal. As part of a commitment to living with intention.
I’m also proud to share that I am managing to stay mostly on track with my 10 KM run training. GCD came just over a week into my ten week run training program, and while sticking to this schedule has been at times challenging, as the only constant in my life right now it has also been a comfort during this period of much change. My run is three weeks from today. I intend to be ready for it.
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