This past week was a bit bumpy. Had to struggle not to lose sight of the silver linings.

The bumpiness started when my flight home from New York arrived at the Toronto Island Airport Monday afternoon. As I rode the ferry and then shuttle bus to Union Station, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I still had a four hour drive ahead of me before I’d be all the way home (in Ottawa).

I think the fact that the Island airport is downtown, and I’ve never lived in downtown T.O. (my folks’ place is about 25 minutes North, at the top, rather than bottom, of the city’s U-shaped subway line) made me feel particularly out of sorts.

I found myself watching the sites go by the same way I had as a tourist in NYC. Started wondering just how long ’til I start feeling like I live in Toronto and am not just here on a really long vacation . . .

Then when I got home I realized I’d not seen my watch since my move. So I started hunting for it obsessively. But fate decided I would come across my former wedding ring instead. F, that was a bummer. Thank goodness my Mom was around for a hug. And my friend S around for some supportive texting.

S is someone I haven’t written about much in this blog, but she’s made a huge difference in my life lately. Our running joke is that we’re twins cause we’re so often thinking the exact same thing. For some reason the universe didn’t see us connecting on this level until about a month before I moved away from Ottawa. But through the magic that is my favorite form of communication (texting) we’ve managed to be in touch almost daily since my move.

So yeh, silver linings not completely lost.

But often one bad day leads to another, and so it was wasn’t until Wednesday that I started feeling a bit steadier. Met my Mom for lunch downtown, did some shopping for my upcoming canoe trip, and made it to a spinning class at the gym. Amazing how much difference the endorphins from a good workout make.

In fact, I am starting to feel like days without a workout are something I should eliminate from my life.

Take yesterday as an example. Sore from having gone to two classes on Thursday (Body Pump and Vinyassa Yoga) I decided not workout. This also fit well with my plans to escape from the city with my friend N. We took a road trip here:

Had a really lovely time. As happy as I am with my decision to move back to T.O., I am a nature lover and have been missing the easy access to long winding roads surrounded by green that Ottawa has so much of.

But then I got home, made a stir fry for dinner, talked to S on the phone and . . . suddenly started to feel like crap again.

I wrote about my decision to avoid processed foods at the end of my juice cleanse a couple weeks ago. Well, this flew out the window at around 11:30 pm last night as I found myself snacking on some old favs (preservative infused granola bar, yoghurt and crackers).

When I look at the two points I felt shittiest this week (Monday and Friday nights) I note two commonalities. (1) the end (back from NYC) and beginning (leave for my canoe trip today) of trips. (2) Didn’t workout.

I need to do some more thinking on (1). I love to travel, but I think my uneasiness before and after trips might say something around how I handle in betweens.

As for (2), I think a commitment is in order. An experiment of sorts. Starting today, I’ll not let a day pass that doesn’t involve a minimum 30 minute workout.

This works out well given my plans today: Go for a run, finish packing and head off on my next adventure. Here.

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