So, going by house rules, I’ve been on a total of three dates this year.

These would be considered terrible stats were it not for one important fact: I’ve been on somewhat of a self-imposed dating hiatus since late spring.

I say somewhat because one of my three dates took place in the summer, so I’ve not been ignoring solid-looking opportunities that emerged without any effort on my part (in that case friends set me up) . . . but I also haven’t exactly been putting myself out there.

There have been some good reasons for this.

And the benefits of having spent much of this year solo have been clear.

I have a much better understanding of what I can both offer to, and need from, a parter as a result of having gotten to know, love and nurture myself at a depth I never gave myself the space to reach previously.

I deepened my connections with my close friends . . . even those of you hundreds of kilometres away . . . as I was forced to reach out for support through some seriously emotionally difficult challenges that have marked my year (while also contributing to making dating a non-possibility . . . poor stats rationale number two, if you’re counting).

And by clearing my head of “how much longer will I be single” type thoughts, I opened myself up to a world of possibilities that has me so engaged and in love with my life in this present moment that the thought of turning my attention to “meeting someone” seems like a poor use of my energy.

But . . .

When my friend F called me today on spending more time focusing on other people’s dating situations than my own . . .

Well, it got me thinking.

Three dates in one year . . .

Rationales aside . . .

Is this a stat I’m cool with ending the year on?

Or, is it maybe time for me to start dating again?

Advertisements